Thank you, Joe, for enlightening me

I've taken a few days off from blogging, partly due to a cloudy feeling (likely related to the recent weather change) and didn't want to bring anyone down. That, and, I felt I needn't force a blog post. When it comes, it comes.  Luckily for me (and maybe you) those few days have given me some things to ponder. Continuing to research the virtual vegan empire, jumping from blog to blog, clicking impulsively from link to link... really working the vegan e-voyeurism angle to gain some perspective. Honestly, I've clicked so much I can't remember which articles/blog posts I liked, all the site names in my history sound the same (should have left better bread crumbs). Alas, some of the fortunate few have made their way to a small, yet growing section to your left entitled "Links I Like" and is being updated often.

Regardless, instead of rehashing my recent cyber treks or a play-by-play of each meal, I'll move on to this weekend's learning experience for me. Last night, we went into Greenwich Village to partake in holiday madness with a group of people we've never met before, invited by one of the only 3 vegans I know personally within a 100+mi radius (a girl for whom I owe a huge thank you to for being a catalyst for my current situation).

During last night's festivities (none of which centered around veganism), I had the pleasure of flexing my mental muscle (packed full of my newly gained knowledge set, based upon my first hand experience in dietetics) in a friendly debate about the current American food culture and disparity/culture change with a pretentious, elitist, NYU grad student whose every retort (in agreement or not) was likely a vast plagiarism of one of his professor's seminars (and I say this with the utmost respect for him and his views because overall we were in like company and I genuinely enjoyed the conversation - I add the, perhaps harsh, description to provide you with a rich, be it stereotypical, portrait of my chess mate). It was nice to prove (to myself at least) that I could, in fact, step toe-to-toe with someone of that caliber whose command of the subject is undoubtedly stronger than mine simply due to his well-read nature and his contemporary coursework.

Towards to end of the night, I had the opportunity (which I believe will not be a rare occurrence in the coming future) to defend myself as a vegan to a complete stranger with a food background. He listened openly as I explained myself, offered up his general dislikes for the vegan movement (mainly focusing in on what dense culture I'll be missing by eliminating animal by-products), and I suppose my responses were adequate and well-balanced enough to award themselves a respectful bow of an agreement to disagree. I was astonished to be a labeled a "progressive thinker" from our brief dialogue but I'll take it (and try not to think too much of it).

I think what I enjoyed the most, other than the boost of confidence, was the ability to show myself that maybe, just maybe, I am doing something right (remember I call myself a realist when I would probably be more accurately described as a self-perpetuating pessimist). It helped me to sort through my beliefs by forcing me to voice them. I recognize that there is a lot I do not know or understand, not everything you read can be taken as gospel no matter whose mouth it comes from, and the only way to broaden your understanding is to engage in intellectual conversation with those who have a differing set of beliefs and access to inventive resources. I know the basics of where I'm lacking, the general direction I need to point myself in, and have the wherewithal to humbly and freely acknowledge my faults. I believe that my general acceptance of these facts is the only way to evolve, as a person and a vegan.

With that said, I wish I wasn't so tipsy as to not be able to recall half of the books on his bookshelf. I'd be very interested to dive into that reading list. If you have any reading materials I could grow from familiarizing myself with, please leave comments with your suggestions. The books I already have on my reading list include The Omnivore's Dilemma, In Defense of Food, Food Rules, Food Fight, Food Politics, What to Eat, The Cultural Politics of Food and Eating, Food, Inc., Fast Food Nation, Stuffed and Starved, The Ethics of What We Eat and that should hold me over for awhile (some of which I own and have started but never finished - mainly from my A.D.D. with reading, maybe related to an mild case of undiagnosed dyslexia). Any who,  I strongly encourage you to leave me your suggestions so that I may be increasingly well rounded.

Ick day

Coming home after a sincerely shitty day at work and having no idea what to make for din din is really just adding insult to injury. And that's where my buddy S.Adams comes into play. Cracked him open and pasta prima-veg came to life. Literally threw every vegetable in my fridge into the pan (summer squash, eggplant, onion, pepper, lima beans, arugula, mushroom, kitchen sink), sauteed over evoo & garlic, and tossed in whole grain penne. So satisfying. So, that was my night... a beer, pasta-veg concoction, and a chick flick. No better way to end a shitty day (on a weeknight at least).

Good news! The cake went over well (Betty Crocker ain't got nothin' on me), however scratch that whole safe to use almond extract thing. Way too almondy. Next time, add more pb instead. Otherwise, success!

Other good news, just saw via twitter per @VegNews, Isa Chandra is hosting a vegan cooking show on the new Cooking Channel, brought to you by the makers of Food Network. Do I even get the new cooking channel? Cablevision, you screw me again. On that note, the sooner I go to bed, the sooner it won't be today anymore. What's that Annie? Actually, according to iGoogle the sun will be out tomorrow, along with a high of 38 with a real feel of 26. Looks like tomorrow's recipe of the day will be vegan hot cocoa.

Chocolate Cake

To help celebrate a co-workers birthday (even if she didn't even remember her birthday is tomorrow, guess that's what happens when you're 40-something?), tonight I tackle a vegan chocolate cake with chocolate pb frosting while rocking out to reggae. No causalities to report (yet). A few things I have learned from tonight's extravaganza:
1. My hand mixer is ungodly strong- Seriously afraid of putting faster than the 1st setting for fear of cracking my pyrex bowls.
2. Where the hell did my rubber spatula go?! Oh, that's right, Matt melted it this summer making scrambled eggs. Do not bake if you don't have a rubber spatula; it's frustrating. You don't get that deep satisfaction from cleaning a glass bowl with any other kitchen tool.

3. Almond extract is safe to use if you find you've run out of vanilla extract. Warning- it's strong so put in less than it calls for. Yes, my frosting is "almondy." A bit too much.
4. Beat in confectioners sugar slowly, little by little. Alton Brown taught me that. Don't forget it, it's key to making frosting.

Side note- It's incredible to me how easy it is for me to resist brownies, cakes, and cookies etc now that I'm not eating eggs & dairy. Normally, you couldn't leave any treat within a 10 mile radius of me without me knowing and thus devouring. I was an absolute sucker for desserts (and desserts I had... everyday at work. I knew the second a patient's family left us goodies at the nurses station usually before anyone else). Don't get me wrong, I'm still a sucker for sweets but it's not the same. You can have an entire Venetian service laid out in front of me and it wouldn't phase me. In fact, that's what I'm up against on Friday at the company's Christmas party. I don't crave the stuff like I used to and don't need to down a whole box of cookies to feel better about my day. This is great! Additional plus, I've already dropped about 4lbs (without stepping foot in the gym in over 2wk). I'll let you know how the cake does tomorrow.

Buffalo Tempeh Wrap = Yum

I am continually amazed by my boyfriend's quick fire culinary prowess. We both came home tonight starving! I stand there, staring into the fridge with a glazed-over look, trying desperately to piece together a filling and fulfilling meal. Wanting so much to play with tempeh but completely unimaginative. In swoops Matt. Takes the tempeh and runs with it. (Sorry, we're watching Monday Night Countdown show)

First, he made some basic brown rice & beans. Then, heated up the tempeh and his homemade vegan wing sauce (Frank's Red Hot, vegan margarine, jalapenos, and spices). Tossed the tempeh in the sauce, cut into strips, and served in a whole wheat wrap over lettuce and rice & beans. So basic, so simple, so delicious! Next time I'd add some corn but overall a huge hit.

Now I have to go do the dishes. Totally worth it. Then, pick up where I left off on those cookbooks.

New Vegan Cookbooks!

After a fairly successful X-mas shopping trip today, I swung by Barnes & Noble to pick up some new vegan cookbooks. Currently have some good vegan cookbooks in my home arsenal but definitely needed to add to it. My originals include Moskowitz's Vegan with a Vengence and Vegan Cupcakes Take Over the World  along with Robertson's Vegan Plant and Graimes' Vegetarian. (Clearly, I recommend picking up all of them if you haven't already!) Today I picked up Moskowitz & Romero's Veganomicon and Appetite for Reduction and Robertson's 1,000 Vegan Recipes. Bet you can't tell who I'm partial to in the vegan cookbook world. Tonight's project, aside from rearranging my pantry (which I have miraculously completed), is to skim through them all and pick a minimum of ten recipes to make this week. Excited!

Trendy?

I wouldn't go calling myself trendy. No, I've never been "trendy." I mean come on, nearly 26 and this is my first blogging experience. Just last week started a Twitter account. How behind the times can one be? It's like my grandmother trying to text. Yet I can see how someone could think I'm trying to be trendy or that maybe I'm a tree hugging hippie or even your run-of-the-mill hipster (eh, I do wear hoodies). Yeah, I'm none of those things. Not that they're bad, they're just not how I would describe myself. No, my veganism isn't a desperate attempt to fit in with the green movement although I do happen to agree with it (but I won't be cutting back on my 20+min showers anytime soon). Purely a health thing. Or is it?

Like I said, not a tree hugging hippie. Eating meat doesn't bother me. I don't get nauseous from thinking about where it comes from or anything. I didn't think I'd really connect with the whole "compassionate" side of being vegan. And once again, I was wrong.

Suppose I'm more compassionate than I thought. Well, maybe I'm not completely surprised. After all, I do work with the geriatric population and that certainly takes compassion. Take today for instance, before lunch I had two sincerely empathetic conversations, one an employee, the other a patient. Or maybe people find me easy to open up to. Where was I going with this? Oh yeah! Me being compassionate and animals and all. I have a hard time watching scenes with animal violence but I have a difficult time connecting that to cattle and fish. I've served homemade ice cream on a local dairy farm and never once saw them abused.  I adopted my dog from a shelter in Mississippi. But again no observable abuse as long as you don't count those ASPCA commercials with Sarah Mclachlan. So why all this animal compassion talk if it's not your thing? Let's just say I'm easily persuaded by the visual arts aka I watched Food, Inc. Choked up to verge of tears by minute 14. Would have been crying if I were alone. Compassion or premenstrual, likely both. Regardless, I'm starting to see the link. Continuing to have a hard time with the wool thing but I'm sure as an industry, it's similar. Makes you think what hasn't man ruined. We manipulate, manufacture, and manhandle everything we touch. Our capitalism/industrial greed has brought on a naive sense of well being and progress, a lot like microwaveable meals. Aw crap! Now I do sound like a high strung political yuppie hipster (if that makes any sense).

Prep Work

First off, I'd like to thank everyone for their supportive comments either via the blog, email, txt, or fb!

Now that the stage, or I should have said table, is set, we can delve into the tofu & potatoes. My decision has been made, now where to start? It would be wasteful to simply toss all my current non-vegan food items. Thankfully, I'm not a huge meat person to begin with, except for fish and dairy. I heart sushi and pretty much every dairy product ever produced. All I really have to do is finish all the milk in my fridge and replenish with veggie-friendly om noms. Well, not all the eggs and dairy are out. Remember: I have a roommate with benefits; who has graciously agreed to vegetarianism or rather pescatarianism (lacto-ovo-poisson). Milk went bad before I could finish it. Suppose it was trying to tell me something. Monday night the man and I went food shopping. Crazy, I remember my old grocery store having most everything I needed. My new store... lacking. Since I'm adverse to cooking (and food shopping... seriously! I dawdle, overwhelmed to the point where I'm constantly walking into people. Won't even push the cart, practically useless) I have no idea where to find these strange new organic matters. Only place I know for sure will have my coveted chew, Whole Foods.

How come the only place I know will undoubtedly have my vegan necessities is a national chain store specifically geared to eco lovers? How pathetic is that! Like no where else sells plants to eat. It does have its perks though. I know everything will be labeled vegan so there's no guess work. That's kinda nice for someone novice who can easily become lazy- take down some barriers, build a better bond and voila! You're hooked! Until you're comfortable or at the very least ready for the next challenge. I must say it's ironic that a place emerging from the fervor of organic, natural, green living, rebelling against mainstream markets is perfectly marketed and as commercial as Starbucks. Maybe ironic wasn't the right word, but you get the jist. I'll expand my vendors of choice at a later date.

Setting the Meatless Stage

So let’s start by clearing the air. Yes, this is my blog about being a new vegan but I must be honest… this is not my first vegan adventure. My first trip through the vegan frontier was about 2 yr ago and went a little something like this:

I was in my dietetic internship (oh! That’s the other thing, I’m a Registered Dietitian. So, I’m not a complete dummy about health and food but don’t be surprised by my shockingly American unhealthy lifestyle) working in the nutrition clinic preaching plant based diets etc. to every man, woman, and child with every ailment under the sun, predominantly obesity, cardiovascular disease, diabetes and so on. About 2 weeks in I had an epiphany! Here I am, this young 20-something, telling all these sick middle aged people to eat more fruits and vegetables, less fast food, less processed foods, more whole grains yada yada and not only do I eat like crap, I don’t know how to pick a vegetable let alone make a meal of one! I don’t cook. In fact, I strongly dislike cooking (too lazy). But, eating… I know eating. I unjustly blame my mom for that. She only cooked out of necessity with few vegetables and little deviation from box mac & cheese, hamburger helper, and hot dogs & beans. Have I mentioned we even got a Christmas card from Domino’s once? That’s how often we ate pizza. Not surprising my entire immediate family is obese with high blood pressure. Guess that’s why I became a dietitian.

I digress. So, ok, I realize I’m a huge hypocrite. What do we do about this? I turned to an experiment with veganism for 6 months to truly know what it’s like to be on the other side of that table. How can I be a good clinician if I don’t really know my patients? What about my families struggling with food allergies? They need to become master label readers for their son or daughter’s safety. How could I genuinely sympathize? Well, I think I found my answer. I decided to walk a mile in the shoes of all those junk food junkies I’m advising and eat a plant based diet; which is quite possibly the farthest thing from their current diet and my own.

The first words out of everybody’s mouths were “Why?” then “Why not just vegetarian?” My response: Vegetarian is too easy. I hate handling meat as it is; like it, don’t love it. Plus, for this to really make an impact I must force myself outside of my comfort zone. So off I went, buying some vegan cookbooks and scouring the “natural foods” aisles at the nearest supermarkets. I did ok. Boy, did I miss cheese. Real Cheese. This soy cheeze had nothing on the real thing. Otherwise, I was fine with mock meat and pb&j sandwiches. Had some tough times when out to eat with friends. Almost had a breakdown in a mall food court because I was starving and the only thing I could eat was a salad. The last thing I wanted was another friggin’ salad. Dropped 15 lbs in the first 3 months then proceeded to gain most of it back when I got lazy and turned to a strong dependence on French fries, Clif bars, Red Bull, and Swedish fish.

That’s where I went wrong. I was committed to the guidelines of “what not to eat” but not “what to eat.” I was also in this subconscious temporary state where I knew by the 4^th of July I’d be eating cheeseburgers again. Side note- it’s very interesting how others respond when you tell them it’s only temporary. Their faces have this “Phew!” look on them and they don’t think you’re quite as crazy and sadistic.

Where does that leave us now? Well, I’m right back where I started. Hypocritically unhealthy. I’m barely 5’1”, 135lb, always tired, moderately depressed and generally unfulfilled. Don’t get me wrong! I have a good job that I mostly enjoy, a great live-in boyfriend who cooks 99.9% my meals, and a loving family. Yet something is still missing; a zest or a purpose. I feel so dull and blah… may have something to do with the constipation. (Forgot to warn you, I’m real big on TMI, especially regarding bowel movements. Hey! Everybody poops and it’s important.) Well, recently we attended “Thankstobeirfast- a vegan thanksgiving drunken delight” at my boyfriend’s ex-coworker’s house (pardon the obscurity). Since then it hit me hard. I miss being vegan. I miss being more empowered over what I put in my body. I miss easily resisting the urge for every brownie in sight on the grounds of solidarity vs willpower. I miss not being crappy. And I kinda liked being different. I really liked being thinner.

In a manic revelation, I stomped my foot down and said “that’s it, I’m going Vegan!” To further my manic streak, in the shower (because that’s where I do the best thinking) I formulated this fabulous idea to start a blog about it. And here we are today.